As Jenn entered her 3rd decade she was ruminating on how her life had turned out. She told me about the dreams she had for herself when she was in her early 20’s and how she would never have guessed that her life would be what it is like now. It got me thinking of my own 20 year old self and the grand plans that I had schemed. At that point I was still in the band “Echo Union” with my buddies and we had our lives all planned out. It was to be glorious, fast, hard, music and partying nonstop. Well…not only did those plans not even remotely come to fruition, I realized that I have no desire now for them to. I don’t really like loud music on loud stages. Bright lights irritate my eyes. I would rather not play to a huge room…I’m not all that fond of crowds. I don’t like being out that late. Call me lame. Call me whatever you want. The reality is that I have kids now…they come first, always. The most important thing is that I am ready and willing to be a great dad every day come 8AM, when they wake up. If that makes me lame, then so be it. Plans don’t work (it’s okay)
If you’re listening and you think “Jeez…his voice doesn’t sound that great” No worries…just another consequence of this life stage. I had to record this one quietly and not wake up the sleeping kids in the adjacent room so I had to sing very quietly. It will sound better on the album, and the whistle solo will be an actual pennywhistle, not just me whistling poorly (and quietly) with my lips.
Here’s the lyrics:
12 or so years ago, the guys and I had just played a show
alive in that way only stage folk know
We stayed up at least till 5 planning out our future lives
and it would have been quite a ride
We were destined for the road, no time for wives or kids in tow
we’d travel around from show to show
crowds and lights and writing tunes, we’d never have to wear a suit
and retire on the beach at 42.
but Hey It didn’t work out that way
I gave up on a dream, but I’m not ashamed
between a life on the road or a family at home
there’s nothing that I’d want to change.
We’d have no homes or loads of stuff, our fellowship would be enough
and the music would keep us all filled up
On tour we’d meet adoring fans and have parties in stretch limo vans
and the next day we’d do it again.
I still like music, but not too loud, I like to be home at a decent hour
and I don’t really care for large crowds
I learned sometimes to let dreams go and make space for something more
and the best may yet be in store
Oh, Life ain’t the same anymore
the landscape changes the more I roam
To the fields I will go to plant ideas in rows
and wait to see what will grow